The Night Before the Leap
When I first started my PhD, I honestly thought these years would be nothing more than a blur of sleepless nights, endless exams, and the constant sense of just trying to survive.
There were moments I wanted to quit. In fact, the night before I left, I cried—not from stress, but from being scared to start a new chapter.
And there were times when the pressure felt heavy, when the distance from home made me wonder if any of this was even worth it. But as time passed, I realized something unexpected:
The moments I hated the most—the ones that made me feel like I was falling apart—those were the moments I would come to cherish the most.
Maybe it was because I survived them. Maybe it was the people who stayed by my side through it all. Or maybe, it was because these worst moments were the ones that taught me the most.
@@page@@
The Art of Barely Getting By
The first year wasn’t tragic. It was just… chaotic. I showed up thinking I was ready, but within two days I realized I wasn’t. Classes made no sense. The system was different. And somehow, everything I thought I knew felt like it had been reset.
But I adapted. Not by being the loudest or smartest—but by doing what worked for me. If I needed to stay home, I stayed. If I didn’t get the joke, I laughed anyway (and Googled it later).
I didn’t thrive. I didn’t shine. I just survived—and that was enough. People think “barely surviving” is a failure. But sometimes, it’s exactly how you start building something real.
If you’re in that same place—just remember this:
@@@quote@@@ Struggling doesn’t make you weak. Learning differently doesn’t make you behind. Sometimes you just need time, space, and your own rhythm to grow. @@@end-quote@@@
@@page@@
Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Right Friend
I never imagined that the most random, awkward encounters would turn into some of the most meaningful friendships. I met one of my best friends on my first day of PhD, at the wrong place at the wrong time.
We both ended up in front of the wrong orientation room, standing there confused. But somehow, that moment led to one of the most enduring friendships I’d ever have.
He became the guy who knocked on my door whenever I disappeared. Who made sarcasm his main language whenever I worried about anything. Who kept “teaching” me things I never asked for and didn’t even care about.
Never gentle, never soft—but always there.
@@@quote@@@ Honestly, sometimes that’s all it takes—a couple of good people around you,
and the whole journey feels a lot less heavy. @@@end-quote@@@
@@page@@
The Small Things That Got Us Through
In the thick of it all, there are small, seemingly insignificant things that you never think will matter—but somehow, they make everything better.
Like how my friend would always be there, joking around, saying things like:“No worries, your accent is perfectly fine. I just didn’t pay attention to you at all.”
Or the countless nights spent drinking beers, playing games, and laughing at each other while struggling to complete a simple task because we just couldn’t focus. Or when my friend would drag me on a road trip, claiming it would be the “best decision ever,” which would turn into the most unforgettable memories.
At the time, I didn’t realize how much those moments would shape me, but now, they’re the ones I miss the most.
@@page@@
Lessons Learned from Struggling Together
The greatest lessons of my PhD didn’t come from books or lectures—they came from the people who shared this experience with me.
When everything felt like it was falling apart, it was those friendships that pulled me back up. It wasn’t just about surviving—it was about realizing that these worst moments were shaping my future memories.
In those times when it felt like I was drowning in stress, I found the people who helped me breathe. And it wasn’t always with words—it was through shared laughter, sarcastic comments, and the simple act of being there.
@@page@@
Finding Meaning in the Mess
The best part about life’s toughest moments is that, with time, they transform.
When you’re in the middle of a struggle, it’s hard to see the lessons. But eventually, those tough moments fade, and all you’re left with are the memories—and the lessons learned.
As I look back on my PhD journey, I realize that while it wasn’t perfect, it was my journey. The challenges, the breakdowns, the small victories—those are the moments I’ll remember.
I never thought I’d look back on my PhD as one of the best chapters of my life. But here I am—grateful for every tough moment that turned into a lesson, a laugh, or a new friendship.
@@page@@
What I Know Now
The worst moments of my PhD weren’t really the worst. They were just loud. Messy. Unfiltered.
And… completely unforgettable.
They were the nights I thought I was falling apart—but I was actually coming together. They were the days I wanted to quit—but kept going anyway. They were the memories I didn’t post—but will remember forever.
So if you’re in your “worst” moment right now—broke, lost, anxious, doubting everything—Remember: these may one day be the best memories of your life.
As they were mine.
@@page@@
The Road Ahead
The most interesting thing I’ve learned is that the beginning of anything important is rarely loud or dramatic.
It’s quiet. It’s internal. It’s full of small questions, small decisions, small moments of honesty.
That’s the road ahead. And when I look back, I realize that the toughest moments, the ones I dreaded, were just the beginning of something much bigger.
Don’t run from the tough times. Embrace them. Learn from them. Laugh through them. Because one day, you’ll look back and realize those are the moments that define your best memories.
If you ever doubt that a rough day could turn into a cherished memory, just ask me about the time we spent hours drinking beers, playing games, and accidentally making the worst decisions of our lives.
Those, my friend, are the moments I’ll always cherish.
@@@quote@@@ Because one day, you’ll look back and realize those are the moments that define your best memories. @@@end-quote@@@